Monday, November 24, 2014

They're not you.

When it comes to the world around me, I'm not a particularly observant person. (And all the people said...)  I actually think I'm quite high in EQ--I notice how other people are feeling more than most people. But I don't notice shoes or hair or something I'm looking for that is right in front of me.

There is a tendency to assume that most "normal" people are like you, think like you, see what you see, value what you value, have the same weaknesses you have. If you don't like the things I do then I'm weird for being interested in science or "nerd alert."

So at one time I might have thought, "No one will notice that spot or rip," because I wouldn't have. I can hide all traces of the pizza but my wife's nose has super powers--I can't smell it but she can.

I've known children (or students) to lie thinking, "No one will figure out that I'm lying or cheating." The middle school student doesn't realize how many students over the last 20 years--longer than they've been alive--have tried that same trick you just thought up for the first time. The usually not so brilliant student thinks, "They'll never notice that I've plagiarized," even though the professor knows you couldn't use a semicolon correctly to save your life.

If we're really good at something, we will tend to judge those that struggle with it. If we're not good at something then we'll tend to underestimate or distrust the abilities of others at that same thing.

The bottom line. They're not you. Who? Other people. Other people aren't you.

And most of the time, that's perfectly OK. Don't think the normal people think the way you do or act the way you do. Don't think that because you can do it then everybody should be able to. On the other hand, don't insist on doing something when there are others around you who can do it better.

Learn to understand how "the other" thinks. It may just be that not all Democrats are going to hell or that not all Christians are hypocrites. You don't always have to plan before you start a journey but it's also fine to know that you're going to be passing through Chattanooga at 8:53am.

They're not you, and that's OK.

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